A journey of friendship

Have you ever felt empty inside? That's how I feel when I'm feeling depressed. Ironically though, I do not "feel" anything. A hollow trunk, an empty Russian doll, river without its water. Empty. I did not recognize my triggers until I met my wife. Whenever I fail her or unintentionally hurt her in some way (all of which are accidents), a switch turns and I shut down. Prior to my marriage, I had these moments before. I would lay down on my bed motionless for hours sometimes, not feeling anything.  My wife too struggles with depression, though hers has been properly diagnosed. She describes her moments as being "numb". Similar to being out in the cold, but not shivering. You know you should go inside and warm up, but you feel disconnected from yourself.  Marriage for us did not necessarily make us instantaneously happy. Nor did it take away those numbing moments from us. However, it forced us to change. We are committed to each other and staying in a funk is n...

 "When troubles come, the parties to a contractual marriage seek happiness by walking away. They marry to obtain benefits and will stay only as long as they’re receiving what they bargained for. But when troubles come to a covenant marriage, the husband and wife work them through. They marry to give and to grow, bound by covenants to each other, to the community, and to God. Contract companions each give 50 percent. But covenant companions each give 100 percent. Enough and to spare. Each gives enough to cover any shortfall by the other." -Elder Bruce Hafen Let me tell you about a post that I wrote when we were married for no more than 4 days total. Marriage is not a contract. It's a covenant. With any covenant comes a promise. A promise to endure for something better. Ahem, When everything seems to go wrong. This honeymoon of ours was everything but ideal. Visits to the ER, stomach aches, headaches, cuts, pulled up nail beds, immensely sore throats, tonsillitis are just w...

Before I began dating Frances, I was watching a movie with her one day and we got on the topic of what we wanted to see in future spouses. We had a mutual interest in each other at this stage, but this conversation turned out to be a real kick-starter to our relationship. I told Frances that I wanted to always place God above everything. I wanted a spouse that would put God even above me initially. I wanted a spouse that would raise our children in the Gospel if I had passed away. A spouse that always placed God over each relationship.  Furthermore, I had witnessed firsthand the effects of children on a marriage relationship. Some Parents would put the needs and desires of their children sometimes over the needs of their spouse. I strongly disagreed with that notion. God and your spouse are your priorities. In the eternal plan, you will not be spending eternity with your children. Ideally, they would have their spouses and would be with them. Your eternity is with your spouse. Not ...